4 doze of u dat tnk dat 0 gud cUd cum frm d Cove, gaze yr Xquisit Iyz upon dis. f ur 2 laZ 2 read d blasted RTcL, basicaly it sums ^ dat d 1st evr nat txt msgN chmpN isa teen frm Claysburg,PA. u read correctly; we nw av comps 2C hu cn tx d fastst. 13 y/o Morgan Pozgar of Claysburg, PA practiced 4t championship by txtN her bff mor thN 8k tmes a mth. Sure she may av ndless txt msgN on her ph, bt I hope her bffs cn rx em 4 fre. mayB she wl share sme of her 25k $ winnings. IDK bout u bt I tnk we may av got a lil %-) hre. btw, Morgan trns ot 2B d bff of d dautA of a fellow co wrkR. hu knw?

[Translated]
For those of you that think that nothing good could come from The Cove, gaze your exquisite eyes upon this. If you're too lazy to read the blasted article, basically it sums up that the first ever national text messaging champion is a teenager from Claysburg, PA; You read correctly, we now have competitions to see who can text message the fastest. Thirteen year old Morgan Pozgar of Claysburg, PA practiced for the championship by texting her friends more than 8000 times a month. Sure she may have unlimited text messaging on her phone, but I hope her friends can receive them for free. Maybe she will share some of her $25000 winnings. I don't know about you, but I think we may have got a little crazy here. By the way, Morgan turns out to be the best friend of the daughter of a fellow co worker. Who knew?

**Note: Claysburg may not technically be in The Cove, but if The Cove were a Papa John's pizza, then Claysburg would be the cup of garlic butter on the side.**