Sunday, October 22, 2006

Let’s talk about hand washing since it apparently was the topic of conversation this past Homecoming weekend. In my opinion, at least 95% of the people that wash (or warsh as some people ‘round here say) their hands after going to the bathroom do so incorrectly. This makes me upset because people complain about me not washing my hands at all (only after going #1) when really these people aren’t doing anything worse than myself (though I will argue in a little as to why there is no need to the excessive hand wash). Properly washed hands should be done so by wetting the hands first and working up a rather and being sure to wash all areas of the hand including the fingers, palms, back of the hand, finger nails and wrists for at least 20 seconds. Then the hands should be thoroughly rinsed and dried. Finally the kicker is using a paper towel to turn the water off. Of course you can use the waterless hand sanitizer instead of soap as long as you continue to rub your hands until they are dry, for it is the alcohol in these products that kills the germs not the friction of rubbing your hands together as some have you believe. This is true for soaps too, just not the alcohol part but the fact that they have other bacteria killing ingredients.1

So the reality that 95% of people don’t actually do this (most people I witness at The Workplace wash for approximately 8 to 10 seconds and barely cover their hands in soap) is really no worse than me not washing my hands. My argument for not washing my hands is this. As soon as people touch the water faucet after washing, or the door handle for that matter, all the germs that they just fought so long to get rid of are back on their hands. Also I’ll have all my readers know that down there is one of the most cleanest areas of the male body. It typically is washed once a day and is protected the entire day by on average, two layers of comfortably worn cotton. In most cases that area does not handle such bacteria infected material as money, food, garbage, or even snot for that matter. So why would I need to wash my hands after handling such a sanitary device? I don’t, especially if I don’t touch the flusher with my hands (nor do I head-butt the flusher either).

Let’s face it. Germs are everywhere on everything! Probably some of the germiest things you touch everyday are money, and get this Corporate America, your computer keyboards and mice. Ewe! Because honestly when was the last time you washed those at work? And if people are leaving giant turds on the bathroom floor for the innocent and naive to come across, I can almost guaranty that those same people are secretly wiping their naked bottoms on your keyboard and thinking, “This was just as fun as when I did this in college!”

1 WebMD

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Alright...how about we agree to disagree... I will remove you from the burden of being responsible to the "social norm" and I'll try to let it go. I'm glad you're amazingly clean (like everyone else) - that was never the question.

Jimmy said...

Just so everyone knows, that last comment was my friend Liz, I'm pretty sure as she's trying to be sneaky and anonymous. Whatever, you'll still always listen to hear if I wash after I flush. It's okay though. It doesn't affect my opinion of you in the least. Sometimes friends disagree, and sometimes it's just fun to disagree with them.

Moose said...

I must have been doing it wrong all my life. I'm not sure I've ever worked up a "rather", nor do I even know how to do such a thing.

Aside from that, when I worked at Conestoga Wood, we had optical sensors on the urinals, faucets, and paper towel dispensors. So there was no need to turn off the faucet with a paper towel, I just had to use one to open the door.

Megan said...

You are correct in the description of the proper method for handwashing as this is the method deemed correct by the Department of Public Welfare for such places as child care centers. However your argument that washing other then this method of handwashing is equivalent to not washing at all is not a valid argument. Someone who puts soap on their hands is doing more then someone who is not, whether they are scrubbing the twenty seconds (equivalent to singing the alphabet) or not. Then when mentioning that their is no need for washing "down there" when that area is so clean you might want to ask yourself whether it would be more appropriate for you to wash your hands prior to doing your business if for no other reason then to protect the cleanliness of your masculine parts.
-Sorry I missed the verbal harassment you received this past weekend, as I'm sure I could have joined right in.

Jimmy said...

I can only imagine that Liz put you up to this. Which is okay. I enjoy verbal harassment. As for the pre-wash, I actually thought about that during my initial blogging but figured no one would bring it up. Looks like I was wrong. After spending approximately 2 minutes thinking about your argument my only rebuttal is that I could use mind control to unzip, shake and re-zip without touching a single thing. How you ask? Because I am that good (and that stupid).

Liz said...

I didnt' put Megan up to that...and it's fun to disagree with you too. Just to let everyone else know (those not at my house this weekend), we did speak of more in depth topics than common hand hygiene.

DMM said...

Ok - I can't even believe you blogged about this. I have no comment other then...WOWZAA...