So I was at the beach today, chillin' like a villain in the warm South Carolina water jumping waves when two girls slowly made their way towards me on their boogie-boards. Now the funny thing about this was that the ocean current clearly should have been carry them the opposite direction, but that didn't really seem to faze them. Of course I noticed this rather early on and would have been even a little flattered had the two encroaching girls not been . . . well . . . girls. I estimate late high school; probably 11th or 12th grade. I would have given them the benefit of the doubt had they not been carrying on, loudly and stupidly like . . . well . . . two high school girls trying to get a fella’s attention. I was content just jumping my waves; believe me. So that's what I continued to do. Jump my waves like there wasn't a soul around me. Of course I listened into their conversation because by this point I could almost reach out and touch one of them. Suddenly I hear the one girl question the other about what ocean they were in. Now, okay, maybe if you were from India, or Russia, one might (I use that term incredibly loosely) not know what ocean they were in off the beach of SC. But clearly these two girls were from the good old US of A and just the mere thought of someone the age of 18 asking that question made me nearly achieve an aneurism.

So here is the conversation starter they use to try and reel me in. "Are you here by yourself?" Wow! A little forward wouldn't you think? Of course the next question out of their mouth was, "What ocean is this?" Now hold it right there! I have finally arrived at the reason for this entry. It's not to inform you about the Ohio high school chicks that were flirting with a 25 year old guy from The Cove, PA. Oh no! But it is to talk about the ways women feel they need to attract the opposite gender.

It would seem that women like to act dumb in order to pick up a man. Why this is, I have no idea. Is it because they want the man to feel in control? To feel powerful? Do they just want some dumb relationship so they can get into a bed? Who knows? I do know this though. The acting dumb bit is going to get you absolutely nowhere with me. I may be in the minority but I find intelligent women highly attractive. Why would I ever want to be involved in a conversation about what ocean is off the east coast with someone older than the age of nine? Frankly I don’t. And I can’t image that impresses a bunch of other dudes out there either. But hey, women, do what you want to do. If you want to act like a ditz who doesn’t know their hippocampus from their hippo-caboose, go right ahead. Believe me, you won’t find me with too much to say back at you.

And don’t worry. Nothing transpired between me and the high schoolers. I patiently waited them out as they idiotically tried to ride the waves back into shore with absolutely, yet purposefully, no luck at all. Once they had finally caught their waves in and waved, and voiced goodbye, I watched them leave the beach. This of course allowed me to safely walk back to my area of rest on the sand. Why can’t I attract girls in my age bracket that aren’t idiots and are attractive? I know they exist!